Glasnost

Openness

I've thought about it for a while, so I thought I might as well write about it.

It's not secret that my view of the world, of life, and of mankind is... darker, and perhaps more cynical than most of you are used to. For those of you who have already written me off as another maligned youth in the throes of teen angst and anger, please allow me to clarify.

Actually, rather, fuck you. If you had ever bothered to take the time to know me, you'd know that I work based on reasoning, and I've never been known to do anything, just 'cause. This has been my failing in the past, but it is also some form of salvation for me because my existence, to date, has still maintained some sense of meaning and dignity.

That little rant aside, let me say something frankly. I am alone. And I don't mind. Singularity is something we should all be familiar with, and yet we dread it, much like we fear death. We were all born alone, and we will all die alone. That is just the way the world works. It doesn't matter if you have love undying, or build a stairway to hell with a mound of bloody bodies. Once you are dead, you are going where you are alone. Don't expect company.

Life is full of periods of alone-ness. There will be a lot of them. I accepted this when I was a child, and I accept them now, after much soul-searching. There will be times when it will hurt, but there will be times when it will help. There will be times where I won't be alone. I've already cherished those moments, but I've learned not to become conceited or comfortable with the company I find, because at this age, everything is temporal, and isn't built to last.

As for my cynical outlook on life, you'll have to excuse that. Get to know that I do actually have a sense of humour. But also get to know the fact that I can tell people like a weather forecaster tells storms. Within everyone lies some aspect of selfishness, and when their vices are released, and not only that, but justified... Well, you'll have to excuse me if I suffer a bit of ethical indigestion. If people weren't greasy, high calorie, low vitamin pig snouts, you can bet I wouldn't take such exception to them.

It also doesn't help that, yes indeed, I am a human male, trying hard to escape the stereotypes that seem to encompass this society. Maybe I'm just in with the wrong crowd...

Maybe I'm just not in at all.

Also, on the topic of bad times, yes they happen. Yes, they get me down sometimes. But shit happens, and in the scheme of the average human lifespan, they become insignificant speed bumps (which is what I would like some certain people to become, but shhh... it's our little secret). Bad times happen, a lot. Especially when they're the byproduct of somebody elses ambitions or desires. Just be sure to know that good things can happen. Can, and sometimes do. Sometimes. I'm wary of them. I'm too easy to submit to the warm feelings, so I watch where they come from.

Just thought I'd let y'all know that.

Expect more on this in the future, but never expect the whole picture. Actually, expect nothing, and the world will open for you, free of disappointments.