I was just reading this, and I thought that any comment I had wouldn't be fitting for my news blog, so here it is.
A satirical comic was published in a Danish newspaper, and was simultaneously run in a Norwegian newspaper. Now, not everyone even reads a newspaper, but I must say, the reaction from the Middle East was... overzealous?
Well, threatening to attack any Norwegian or Dane, because of a fucking newspaper comic, no matter how blasphemous it is... there's no word in English for this. There have been flag burnings and merchandise boycotts. Okay... let's see. Was there any instance of these nations actually going out of their way to demean Muslims? No, not really. So now, because of a newspaper comic, we have Hamas telling other muslims nations to take "deterrent steps against idiotic Danish behaviour."
"We call on Muslim nations to boycott all Danish products because the Danish people supported the hateful racism under the pretext of freedom of expression," said Hamas. Hateful racism... coming from Hamas. Okay, I'm sure the Israeli's would have something to say about that, albeit they aren't exactly clean books themselves. Once again, it's a newspaper comic. Hateful racism? Grow up and get real.
Oh, I'm sorry sir. I wasn't aware you were conditioned without a sense of humour or tolerance. I'm sorry you couldn't approach something that offended you without resorting to hatemongering and assault. I'm sorry that you should even bother to read newspapers from Scandinavia. You think those are bad? You should see what goes to press in the States, in Canada, and in Britain.
Monday, January 30, 2006
Sunday, January 29, 2006
Skies on Fire
The skies were afire last night in a strange sunset. It was warm enough that I could go outside in my bare feet and take pictures of it. Strange, how I remember a couple years back, at this time of year exactly, the weatherman was saying that any exposed flesh would freeze within five minutes out in the open air.
I've come to love photography, and albeit, a lot of the pictures I throw up here are heavily photoshopped, it doesn't diminish the fact that pictures can say some things that words just can't.
Still, it's strange. That I'm photographing anomalies that have never happened here before. It's not supposed to be like this. It's supposed to be cold and snowy. The skies are supposed to be slate gray, and the wind is supposed to be cold and from the north.
And I'm supposed to be a writer, not a photographer.
Wednesday, January 25, 2006
Monday, January 23, 2006
Glasnost
Openness
I've thought about it for a while, so I thought I might as well write about it.
It's not secret that my view of the world, of life, and of mankind is... darker, and perhaps more cynical than most of you are used to. For those of you who have already written me off as another maligned youth in the throes of teen angst and anger, please allow me to clarify.
Actually, rather, fuck you. If you had ever bothered to take the time to know me, you'd know that I work based on reasoning, and I've never been known to do anything, just 'cause. This has been my failing in the past, but it is also some form of salvation for me because my existence, to date, has still maintained some sense of meaning and dignity.
That little rant aside, let me say something frankly. I am alone. And I don't mind. Singularity is something we should all be familiar with, and yet we dread it, much like we fear death. We were all born alone, and we will all die alone. That is just the way the world works. It doesn't matter if you have love undying, or build a stairway to hell with a mound of bloody bodies. Once you are dead, you are going where you are alone. Don't expect company.
Life is full of periods of alone-ness. There will be a lot of them. I accepted this when I was a child, and I accept them now, after much soul-searching. There will be times when it will hurt, but there will be times when it will help. There will be times where I won't be alone. I've already cherished those moments, but I've learned not to become conceited or comfortable with the company I find, because at this age, everything is temporal, and isn't built to last.
As for my cynical outlook on life, you'll have to excuse that. Get to know that I do actually have a sense of humour. But also get to know the fact that I can tell people like a weather forecaster tells storms. Within everyone lies some aspect of selfishness, and when their vices are released, and not only that, but justified... Well, you'll have to excuse me if I suffer a bit of ethical indigestion. If people weren't greasy, high calorie, low vitamin pig snouts, you can bet I wouldn't take such exception to them.
It also doesn't help that, yes indeed, I am a human male, trying hard to escape the stereotypes that seem to encompass this society. Maybe I'm just in with the wrong crowd...
Maybe I'm just not in at all.
Also, on the topic of bad times, yes they happen. Yes, they get me down sometimes. But shit happens, and in the scheme of the average human lifespan, they become insignificant speed bumps (which is what I would like some certain people to become, but shhh... it's our little secret). Bad times happen, a lot. Especially when they're the byproduct of somebody elses ambitions or desires. Just be sure to know that good things can happen. Can, and sometimes do. Sometimes. I'm wary of them. I'm too easy to submit to the warm feelings, so I watch where they come from.
Just thought I'd let y'all know that.
Expect more on this in the future, but never expect the whole picture. Actually, expect nothing, and the world will open for you, free of disappointments.
I've thought about it for a while, so I thought I might as well write about it.
It's not secret that my view of the world, of life, and of mankind is... darker, and perhaps more cynical than most of you are used to. For those of you who have already written me off as another maligned youth in the throes of teen angst and anger, please allow me to clarify.
Actually, rather, fuck you. If you had ever bothered to take the time to know me, you'd know that I work based on reasoning, and I've never been known to do anything, just 'cause. This has been my failing in the past, but it is also some form of salvation for me because my existence, to date, has still maintained some sense of meaning and dignity.
That little rant aside, let me say something frankly. I am alone. And I don't mind. Singularity is something we should all be familiar with, and yet we dread it, much like we fear death. We were all born alone, and we will all die alone. That is just the way the world works. It doesn't matter if you have love undying, or build a stairway to hell with a mound of bloody bodies. Once you are dead, you are going where you are alone. Don't expect company.
Life is full of periods of alone-ness. There will be a lot of them. I accepted this when I was a child, and I accept them now, after much soul-searching. There will be times when it will hurt, but there will be times when it will help. There will be times where I won't be alone. I've already cherished those moments, but I've learned not to become conceited or comfortable with the company I find, because at this age, everything is temporal, and isn't built to last.
As for my cynical outlook on life, you'll have to excuse that. Get to know that I do actually have a sense of humour. But also get to know the fact that I can tell people like a weather forecaster tells storms. Within everyone lies some aspect of selfishness, and when their vices are released, and not only that, but justified... Well, you'll have to excuse me if I suffer a bit of ethical indigestion. If people weren't greasy, high calorie, low vitamin pig snouts, you can bet I wouldn't take such exception to them.
It also doesn't help that, yes indeed, I am a human male, trying hard to escape the stereotypes that seem to encompass this society. Maybe I'm just in with the wrong crowd...
Maybe I'm just not in at all.
Also, on the topic of bad times, yes they happen. Yes, they get me down sometimes. But shit happens, and in the scheme of the average human lifespan, they become insignificant speed bumps (which is what I would like some certain people to become, but shhh... it's our little secret). Bad times happen, a lot. Especially when they're the byproduct of somebody elses ambitions or desires. Just be sure to know that good things can happen. Can, and sometimes do. Sometimes. I'm wary of them. I'm too easy to submit to the warm feelings, so I watch where they come from.
Just thought I'd let y'all know that.
Expect more on this in the future, but never expect the whole picture. Actually, expect nothing, and the world will open for you, free of disappointments.
Sunday, January 22, 2006
Wretched People
I was going to sleep on this, but I figured I might as well get it out now.
First off, I'd like to say that Mr. Jack Thompson, while he is a lawyer, is less than a man. In the next five minutes, you will read something that will probably sway your thinking to agreement with me. However, I would like to stress that under no circumstances should you contact the man, as he is certifiably wack, and will likely sue anyone not coming to him with money-making lawsuits to pander. That aside, I read this, and am quoting it ad verbatim from Crtl-Alt-Del.
A reader has just brought this matter to my attention.
From GamingHorizon.com:
"Earlier this month, gamer named Mitchell S. with the online screenname "Kuja105" who posts on a few online videogame forums (including GameFaqs.com and MetalGearSolid.org) committed suicide. On January 2 he posted a message in both forums detailing his intent to end his own life, citing overwhelming complications with school and finances.
"Your "gamer friend" will find peace through the Lord, Jesus Christ, but sadly it's too late for that.
There is a void in every heart. You can fill it up with the things of God, or the things not of God. This unfortunate soul chose to fill it up with combat games. The playing of these video games is masturbatory activity, meaning senseless self-stimulation. If you gamers could use a dictionary you would know that that term is not necessarily a sexual one.
The real tragedy here extends beyond the life and death of this one fellow. There are literally millions of young people and young adults whose despair is deepend by turning to the things of this world and then finding them meaningless.
All of you gamers need to put down the controllers and get a life. The utter inanity of the vast majority of postings here shows how vapid "gaming" really is.
You are one of the cheerleaders for this wasting of time and the wasting of lives. Do you feel any remorse for having contributed to this "culture of death?" Of course not. Hey, let's all play MORE games, and ignore all the really productive things to do with our lives.
Let's pretend to be shocked that a gamer might descend into deeper depression, as his gamer "buds," knowing he was killing himself, couldn't figure out how to call 911 themselves for him. That would have involved leaving their computers I guess.
Sad. Sad for all of you."
Here is an article written by friends and peers of Mitchell at MetalGearSolid.org.
Hey all, lets badmouth someone who just committed suicide because of school and financial related issues, and then blame it on videogames, and videogamers. Why stop there? Lets throw in some right wing loco-lunatic propaganda, claim to know about God, and lay down the holier law.
Will I get a life? Is being a writer a life?
Mr. Thompson, once again, if you read this for whatever reason, ask yourself. You're giving up your life in this selfish pursuit. I'd put the weight of a gamer's life over yours anyday, because they live their lives in their own way, without intruding on others.
Inane? Perhaps. Violent? Perhaps. But nothing, nothing, compares to the callousness and disrespect you've shown them now, and in the past. Forgiveness is supposedly a Christian trait, but neither you are I are Christian. So expect no kind forgivings from me when Florida debars you, and you are forced to make your living like the rest of us.
Maybe then, you'll wonder what to do with your free time. Maybe you'll get tired of thumping your bible and will actually get out and do something good for a change.
First off, I'd like to say that Mr. Jack Thompson, while he is a lawyer, is less than a man. In the next five minutes, you will read something that will probably sway your thinking to agreement with me. However, I would like to stress that under no circumstances should you contact the man, as he is certifiably wack, and will likely sue anyone not coming to him with money-making lawsuits to pander. That aside, I read this, and am quoting it ad verbatim from Crtl-Alt-Del.
A reader has just brought this matter to my attention.
From GamingHorizon.com:
"Earlier this month, gamer named Mitchell S. with the online screenname "Kuja105" who posts on a few online videogame forums (including GameFaqs.com and MetalGearSolid.org) committed suicide. On January 2 he posted a message in both forums detailing his intent to end his own life, citing overwhelming complications with school and finances.
A very brief period of initial disbelief was followed by a barrage of replies from fellow forum members pleading that he not take his life, trying to talk him out of it.
For days, no word was heard from Mitchell. Fearing the worst, members and administration from metalgearsolid.org began searching for contact information, spending hours on the phone trying to get in touch with him. Finally on January 4, Ryan K., an administrator at metalgearsolid.org, got him on the phone and spent hours desperately trying to talk him out of it.
Sadly, Mitchell soon ended his own life by consuming antifreeze and painkillers.
Later, members from the site contacted Mitchell's family to find out the grave news. They reported it to their online community, and posted a tribute to their passed friend on the front page of metalgearsolid.org." Full Report Here.
"Your "gamer friend" will find peace through the Lord, Jesus Christ, but sadly it's too late for that.
There is a void in every heart. You can fill it up with the things of God, or the things not of God. This unfortunate soul chose to fill it up with combat games. The playing of these video games is masturbatory activity, meaning senseless self-stimulation. If you gamers could use a dictionary you would know that that term is not necessarily a sexual one.
The real tragedy here extends beyond the life and death of this one fellow. There are literally millions of young people and young adults whose despair is deepend by turning to the things of this world and then finding them meaningless.
All of you gamers need to put down the controllers and get a life. The utter inanity of the vast majority of postings here shows how vapid "gaming" really is.
You are one of the cheerleaders for this wasting of time and the wasting of lives. Do you feel any remorse for having contributed to this "culture of death?" Of course not. Hey, let's all play MORE games, and ignore all the really productive things to do with our lives.
Let's pretend to be shocked that a gamer might descend into deeper depression, as his gamer "buds," knowing he was killing himself, couldn't figure out how to call 911 themselves for him. That would have involved leaving their computers I guess.
Sad. Sad for all of you."
Here is an article written by friends and peers of Mitchell at MetalGearSolid.org.
Hey all, lets badmouth someone who just committed suicide because of school and financial related issues, and then blame it on videogames, and videogamers. Why stop there? Lets throw in some right wing loco-lunatic propaganda, claim to know about God, and lay down the holier law.
Will I get a life? Is being a writer a life?
Mr. Thompson, once again, if you read this for whatever reason, ask yourself. You're giving up your life in this selfish pursuit. I'd put the weight of a gamer's life over yours anyday, because they live their lives in their own way, without intruding on others.
Inane? Perhaps. Violent? Perhaps. But nothing, nothing, compares to the callousness and disrespect you've shown them now, and in the past. Forgiveness is supposedly a Christian trait, but neither you are I are Christian. So expect no kind forgivings from me when Florida debars you, and you are forced to make your living like the rest of us.
Maybe then, you'll wonder what to do with your free time. Maybe you'll get tired of thumping your bible and will actually get out and do something good for a change.
Saturday, January 21, 2006
Hey baby...
...that's a mighty fine gore-hole ya got there. Mind if I add another?
Yeah, that's my punchline from watching Underworld:Evolution yesterday. I was going to be all witty and cool about it, but I didn't really want to subject you guys to an entire entry in tiny format font.
The movie itself was decent, and can be summed up easily in three... maybe four words.
Gore. Violence. Sex. Hair.
Yep, that's right. The only being completely devoid of body hair, excepting head hair, was the female protagonist herself. How do I know? Well, after seeing it on the big-screen, I think she had what they would call a brazilian.
Thexthay.
Snarling aside, lets get up to date here. I'm apologizing to my WoW guild. I've been surpassed twice now by lower characters, and I'm exceedingly sorry. My sister threatened to cut my arm off if she missed another run to Molten Core, so I thought better than tangling with that monster. Well, actually, she didn't threaten me. But she does get really bitchy when she doesn't get her turn (ie. a straight 10-hour hit of WoWing) on the computer. And bitchy is not a term I use lightly.
Funny. How I can be critisized for sitting on a computer all day, doing productive stuff, whilst my sibling, who has forgotten what the Sun and Moon are, is allowed not only to hoard the most powerful PC in our house, but to lord over it's use, and demand levy from those others who wish to use it fairly.
Home this fall will be a different house.
Yeah, that's my punchline from watching Underworld:Evolution yesterday. I was going to be all witty and cool about it, but I didn't really want to subject you guys to an entire entry in tiny format font.
The movie itself was decent, and can be summed up easily in three... maybe four words.
Gore. Violence. Sex. Hair.
Yep, that's right. The only being completely devoid of body hair, excepting head hair, was the female protagonist herself. How do I know? Well, after seeing it on the big-screen, I think she had what they would call a brazilian.
Thexthay.
Snarling aside, lets get up to date here. I'm apologizing to my WoW guild. I've been surpassed twice now by lower characters, and I'm exceedingly sorry. My sister threatened to cut my arm off if she missed another run to Molten Core, so I thought better than tangling with that monster. Well, actually, she didn't threaten me. But she does get really bitchy when she doesn't get her turn (ie. a straight 10-hour hit of WoWing) on the computer. And bitchy is not a term I use lightly.
Funny. How I can be critisized for sitting on a computer all day, doing productive stuff, whilst my sibling, who has forgotten what the Sun and Moon are, is allowed not only to hoard the most powerful PC in our house, but to lord over it's use, and demand levy from those others who wish to use it fairly.
Home this fall will be a different house.
Friday, January 20, 2006
Blogger needs a fixing.
Well, I've been trying to write a clever post about Underworld: Evolution, but seemings as how bloggers text size formatter has kicked the bucket (and had the bucket kicked back), you'll just have to bear with this placer until I calm down enough to not throw my laptop down the stairs.
Fuck you, retarded scripts.
Fuck you, retarded scripts.
Wednesday, January 18, 2006
Freak
It's been a weird week so far. A mix of good and bad. Well, mostly bad, but I'm sure you've all had your daily dose of cynicism and vile, so I'll spare you that for now. Needless to say, I'll be happy when Friday finally arrives. I've been meaning to get out and take some pictures for posting. Last night was a spectacular harvest moon, but I only saw it on my way home, and I just collapsed when I got there, so... my apologies. I've hardly had enough time to eat, let alone pack up my camera gear and actually take pictures.
Some friends of mine are planning on going to Fernie to ski/snowboard on Valentines Day. Naturally, they seek to compound my discomfort by asking me to come along. There are two couples going on this trip. On Valentines Day. I'll leave you clever ones to do the math on that.
On top of that, they want me to rent a snowboard. The prospect of 140 pounds of skin and bone hurtling down a ski hill is terrifying enough. The thought of doing it with my feet bolted onto a shiny flat rocket only compounds my terror to the point that I might actually consider doing it. Just to see what it's like.
The amp cable for my guitar has started coming apart. I got it for free. You always get what you pay for. Remember that. Cherish it. Nurture it, and it will bloom into a wonderful garden of bittersweet remembrance when those cheap toys you got at McDonalds finally hit the pits and you have to get new ones.
A little note on judging people. When you judge someone, it's complete. There's no halfway, and everything they do will suddenly conform or confirm to your judgement. If you judge someone as shallow, everything they do will appear shallow to you. If you judge someone as wise, everything they do will seem wise to you. If you judge someone as emotional, everything they do will seem emotionally charged to you.
Just a thought. Don't judge someone and then point out how right you are. It's pompous, and it makes me hate you.
Some friends of mine are planning on going to Fernie to ski/snowboard on Valentines Day. Naturally, they seek to compound my discomfort by asking me to come along. There are two couples going on this trip. On Valentines Day. I'll leave you clever ones to do the math on that.
On top of that, they want me to rent a snowboard. The prospect of 140 pounds of skin and bone hurtling down a ski hill is terrifying enough. The thought of doing it with my feet bolted onto a shiny flat rocket only compounds my terror to the point that I might actually consider doing it. Just to see what it's like.
The amp cable for my guitar has started coming apart. I got it for free. You always get what you pay for. Remember that. Cherish it. Nurture it, and it will bloom into a wonderful garden of bittersweet remembrance when those cheap toys you got at McDonalds finally hit the pits and you have to get new ones.
A little note on judging people. When you judge someone, it's complete. There's no halfway, and everything they do will suddenly conform or confirm to your judgement. If you judge someone as shallow, everything they do will appear shallow to you. If you judge someone as wise, everything they do will seem wise to you. If you judge someone as emotional, everything they do will seem emotionally charged to you.
Just a thought. Don't judge someone and then point out how right you are. It's pompous, and it makes me hate you.
Tuesday, January 17, 2006
New Music is a million times better
...than old music.
Seriously. Somebody here in Calgary told me that Mogwai sucked, and I wouldn't like it. I want to hurt them so bad. So BAD! And since when does Sigur Ros count as emo? It's not even in English!
In any event, I'd like to pass on my own bit of taste. Thanks to my friend Josh for pointing out Atomship, perhaps one of the coolest bands to come out of the deep south of the United States. Check them out. Very skilled guitar players, but the vocals take a bit to get used to, as does the style. Very good though, I'm looking forward to their next album.
I'm probably going to have to go on the hunt soon for more new stuff.
Seriously. Somebody here in Calgary told me that Mogwai sucked, and I wouldn't like it. I want to hurt them so bad. So BAD! And since when does Sigur Ros count as emo? It's not even in English!
In any event, I'd like to pass on my own bit of taste. Thanks to my friend Josh for pointing out Atomship, perhaps one of the coolest bands to come out of the deep south of the United States. Check them out. Very skilled guitar players, but the vocals take a bit to get used to, as does the style. Very good though, I'm looking forward to their next album.
I'm probably going to have to go on the hunt soon for more new stuff.
Sunday, January 15, 2006
Pregnancy makes you smarter
So say the might researchers as described here.
So, essentially they're saying that pregnancy enhances certain parts of the female brain, and focuses the mental capabilities on child rearing, etc.
This is like saying eating tomatoes every day will protect you from the cancer you know is coming from the 30-some cigarettes you smoke in a day.
Of course having a kid will make you smarter, because you'll sober up and realize the "withdrawal method" doesn't work, and neither does doing a handstand. You'll smarten up, because you'll have to educate yourself on how to rear a child, whether to have an abortion or not, and if you're going to keep the child, or put it up for adoption. Of course, looking at planned pregnancies... ummm. Yeah. I don't think there's actually a lot of intelligence to be gained, rather, it stresses the mental nerves to the point of breaking, and incurs a lot of issues like a syndrome similar to PTSD. It's called orneryness.
So, essentially they're saying that pregnancy enhances certain parts of the female brain, and focuses the mental capabilities on child rearing, etc.
This is like saying eating tomatoes every day will protect you from the cancer you know is coming from the 30-some cigarettes you smoke in a day.
Of course having a kid will make you smarter, because you'll sober up and realize the "withdrawal method" doesn't work, and neither does doing a handstand. You'll smarten up, because you'll have to educate yourself on how to rear a child, whether to have an abortion or not, and if you're going to keep the child, or put it up for adoption. Of course, looking at planned pregnancies... ummm. Yeah. I don't think there's actually a lot of intelligence to be gained, rather, it stresses the mental nerves to the point of breaking, and incurs a lot of issues like a syndrome similar to PTSD. It's called orneryness.
Saturday, January 14, 2006
You sick motherfuckers
Pardon my francois.
I just read this.
The SWAT team just shot a kid. In the head. For pointing a gun (a BB gun no less) at a deputy. The kid hadn't pulled the trigger, and I'm guessing the deputy was wearing a kevlar vest. And yet a SWAT member still felt compelled to off the kid. Even after the parents had been in touch with the police, and told them that they believed their son didn't have a real gun.
Is this a WoMD in Iraq complex or something? I mean, who the fuck shoots a kid in the head when you already know the gun is fake, and he's having a mental breakdown? He's had the opportunity to shoot several students already, so why hasn't he? Goddamn it. It's like the whole goddamn world's gone brain-dead and can't add 2+2 in a crisis situation.
This really riles me. This kid was similar to me at that age in many ways, and he's also similar to many other kids. He's discontent with his life. He was expecting to die. Little did he know that the imbicilic meatwads would go and prove him right. Having sat across the table from RCMP and city police, I can say they're human. I know they make mistakes. But this mistake is just too bloody stupid to just write off. I don't care about shoot-to-kill training. I don't care about protecting the public. A kid curled up in the bathroom with a BB gun is not a fucking threat to the public!
A president running around with thousands of nuclear weapons is a threat to the public!
A mob boss pressing a black market of assault weapons is a threat to the public!
A kid in a bathroom with a toy gun is not a threat.
All the foresight in the world couldn't have prevented this. And they didn't even wait for the kid's parents to arrive to try and negotiate with him. They just... shot him.
Good job fellas. Maybe next time the gun will be in the next room when you decide to off a suspect.
I just read this.
The SWAT team just shot a kid. In the head. For pointing a gun (a BB gun no less) at a deputy. The kid hadn't pulled the trigger, and I'm guessing the deputy was wearing a kevlar vest. And yet a SWAT member still felt compelled to off the kid. Even after the parents had been in touch with the police, and told them that they believed their son didn't have a real gun.
Is this a WoMD in Iraq complex or something? I mean, who the fuck shoots a kid in the head when you already know the gun is fake, and he's having a mental breakdown? He's had the opportunity to shoot several students already, so why hasn't he? Goddamn it. It's like the whole goddamn world's gone brain-dead and can't add 2+2 in a crisis situation.
This really riles me. This kid was similar to me at that age in many ways, and he's also similar to many other kids. He's discontent with his life. He was expecting to die. Little did he know that the imbicilic meatwads would go and prove him right. Having sat across the table from RCMP and city police, I can say they're human. I know they make mistakes. But this mistake is just too bloody stupid to just write off. I don't care about shoot-to-kill training. I don't care about protecting the public. A kid curled up in the bathroom with a BB gun is not a fucking threat to the public!
A president running around with thousands of nuclear weapons is a threat to the public!
A mob boss pressing a black market of assault weapons is a threat to the public!
A kid in a bathroom with a toy gun is not a threat.
All the foresight in the world couldn't have prevented this. And they didn't even wait for the kid's parents to arrive to try and negotiate with him. They just... shot him.
Good job fellas. Maybe next time the gun will be in the next room when you decide to off a suspect.
Strange Discomfort
There are certain circumstances that I never wish anyone to experience.
Being the invisible third wheel while a friend and his girlfriend fight to the point of almost breaking up is one of them. Actually, just being a third wheel to begin with is bad enough, although after witnessing their little spat last night, I can safely say that it's times like this that I don't mind being single so much. The only conflicts I have to contend with are ones of my own conscious or subconscious invention, and even with those, I know exactly what I'm up against. There's no guesswork. There's no hurt feelings. There's no immaturity.
We're talking about 21 year olds behaving like self-righteous, spoiled little brats.
I mean, seriously, get the fuck over yourselves. Grow up. Or somesuch like that.
Patience is one required trait, and humour is another.
If one finds the other lacking, then they really shouldn't bother.
Being the invisible third wheel while a friend and his girlfriend fight to the point of almost breaking up is one of them. Actually, just being a third wheel to begin with is bad enough, although after witnessing their little spat last night, I can safely say that it's times like this that I don't mind being single so much. The only conflicts I have to contend with are ones of my own conscious or subconscious invention, and even with those, I know exactly what I'm up against. There's no guesswork. There's no hurt feelings. There's no immaturity.
We're talking about 21 year olds behaving like self-righteous, spoiled little brats.
I mean, seriously, get the fuck over yourselves. Grow up. Or somesuch like that.
Patience is one required trait, and humour is another.
If one finds the other lacking, then they really shouldn't bother.
Friday, January 13, 2006
Thursday, January 12, 2006
Envy Me
Today was a reinforcement in everything that's wrong with me.
I care too much about things.
Nobody cares what happens to me.
All is well, and as it should be.
I'm finding that these days are feeling more like a waste than an accomplishment.
Somebody save me from this boredom and la-la land of competition and opportunity.
Or don't.
I can't feel anything inside my head anymore. I used to have such a resevoir of bright ideas, unique thoughts, and stories to write and say. I think the hard news reality has dampened that, if not outright killed it. Shed a tear today, because this might be the death of an artist, and the birth of a monster.
Today might be the day like any other day, in any other week, where nothing happens, and the world changes.
Tonight might be the sleep that makes all the sense. Tonight might be the night I wake up from the nightmare with a breath of relief. Or tonight might just be a period of darkness before the morning comes, and this all starts again.
Where have all my ideas gone? Surely this rambling has gotten boring by now.
I care too much about things.
Nobody cares what happens to me.
All is well, and as it should be.
I'm finding that these days are feeling more like a waste than an accomplishment.
Somebody save me from this boredom and la-la land of competition and opportunity.
Or don't.
I can't feel anything inside my head anymore. I used to have such a resevoir of bright ideas, unique thoughts, and stories to write and say. I think the hard news reality has dampened that, if not outright killed it. Shed a tear today, because this might be the death of an artist, and the birth of a monster.
Today might be the day like any other day, in any other week, where nothing happens, and the world changes.
Tonight might be the sleep that makes all the sense. Tonight might be the night I wake up from the nightmare with a breath of relief. Or tonight might just be a period of darkness before the morning comes, and this all starts again.
Where have all my ideas gone? Surely this rambling has gotten boring by now.
Wednesday, January 11, 2006
Crossroad
There will come a time in your young lives, when the sum of your entire existence will come to a fork in the road. You might not accept that it's come to this. You might break down because, while things were so good, all good things must come to an end and yield to the inevitable change.
Some of you might even wish that would could go back down the path you've come, somehow hoping that every step you retrace, you will re-experience every step as if it was new. It works for one, it fades for two, and by the third step back, you will find you are deluding yourself. History only flows in one direction, and trying to repeat it only destroys it.
The crossroads is your future, and your choice in direction will lead you to your destiny. Don't be mistaken, each path may take you places you may have gone before, but from a new angle, and to a new end. Every step down the new path will reveal new wonders of the world that you had never thought possible, and every leg of the journey is a new piece of yourself to contribute to your entirety.
Don't fear the choices of the future. Time can be like a bad warranteer, taking your most prized possessions or feelings, and replacing them with something different, but of equal or greater value.
Alas, but if only that was true.
Some of you might even wish that would could go back down the path you've come, somehow hoping that every step you retrace, you will re-experience every step as if it was new. It works for one, it fades for two, and by the third step back, you will find you are deluding yourself. History only flows in one direction, and trying to repeat it only destroys it.
The crossroads is your future, and your choice in direction will lead you to your destiny. Don't be mistaken, each path may take you places you may have gone before, but from a new angle, and to a new end. Every step down the new path will reveal new wonders of the world that you had never thought possible, and every leg of the journey is a new piece of yourself to contribute to your entirety.
Don't fear the choices of the future. Time can be like a bad warranteer, taking your most prized possessions or feelings, and replacing them with something different, but of equal or greater value.
Alas, but if only that was true.
Image over Thought
I found this in the Gulf Daily News, via GoogleNews.
Binge-eating worse than cheating!
Don't feel anything if it isn't hurting anyone. And it's not hurting anyone if they don't know about it.
I'm beginning to sound like someone I know.
Binge-eating worse than cheating!
A Mad, Mad World...
MOST Italians feel more guilty about over-eating than they do about cheating on their partners, a survey has found, suggesting that people in Casanova's native land care more about staying slim than staying faithful.
The survey, by psychology magazine Riza Psicosomatica, found that excessive eating and spending topped the list of what people considered the most guilt-inducing vices.
Sexual infidelity came bottom of the list of the magazine's 'seven deadly sins', behind neglecting friends and family, failing at work and not looking after one's physique.
The survey of some 1,000 Italians aged 25-55 found that religion played little part in determining what made people feel guilty, despite Italy's Roman Catholic traditions.
Only seven per cent of those questioned said religious rules induced guilt. The most powerful drivers of guilty feelings were the judgement of loved ones or the disapproval of society as a whole.
Naturally, who cares if you're sleeping around. As long as you're sexy and don't eat like a cow, companionship is just a flirt, phone-call, or ass slap away.Don't feel anything if it isn't hurting anyone. And it's not hurting anyone if they don't know about it.
I'm beginning to sound like someone I know.
Tuesday, January 10, 2006
A Tiny Celebration
Everyone's back in town. As celebration, here's a picture I took during Christmas.
Hyper-contrast photographs are awesome. Nothing pops quite like a massive contrast of light and dark, and those eye-cutting colours. Enjoy, friends.
Hyper-contrast photographs are awesome. Nothing pops quite like a massive contrast of light and dark, and those eye-cutting colours. Enjoy, friends.
Monday, January 09, 2006
Cast Down
We start out simple, like children at play. Pretending we're happy, until we grow bored with our childish games, and seek to accomplish something that burns inside us.
Ambitions and dreams well up within us, like bubbles of air from the murk. Like a fire, it consumes us, but also gives us life. It's what distinguishes us from the cold corpses of our forefathers. The fire of ambition is what drives us to greater and greater heights, until comes a time that we reach for something beyond our grasp, or beyond our comprehension.
Trying to attain that which is unattainable...
When we reach the top, there is nowhere to go but down. Always at the height, we are cast down, time and again, until we rebuild to newer and greater heights of accomplishment. Eventually, we fail at our greater deeds, and we learn to settle for the lesser ones. Until we learn to settle for nothing, and we call it an accomplishment.
And the fire of ambition goes out of us. We become the walking dead, with no meaning to our lives. We do not dream. We do not create. We exist but to exist.
And then, somewhere among the cold press of bodies,
A thought...
Ambitions and dreams well up within us, like bubbles of air from the murk. Like a fire, it consumes us, but also gives us life. It's what distinguishes us from the cold corpses of our forefathers. The fire of ambition is what drives us to greater and greater heights, until comes a time that we reach for something beyond our grasp, or beyond our comprehension.
Trying to attain that which is unattainable...
When we reach the top, there is nowhere to go but down. Always at the height, we are cast down, time and again, until we rebuild to newer and greater heights of accomplishment. Eventually, we fail at our greater deeds, and we learn to settle for the lesser ones. Until we learn to settle for nothing, and we call it an accomplishment.
And the fire of ambition goes out of us. We become the walking dead, with no meaning to our lives. We do not dream. We do not create. We exist but to exist.
And then, somewhere among the cold press of bodies,
A thought...
Saturday, January 07, 2006
Particle Theory
A mix of boredom and impending illness inspired me to set my camera up next to the pool table and see what kind of shots I could get. They might look good here, but let me tell you, the lights in my basement are terrible, my best efforts couldn't correct all of the colour casting in the picture.
But anyway, less prattle, more pictoral.
If these were neutrons and protons, I'd be thoroughly irradiated right now. Highly amusing for some, highly disturbing for others.
Just think. Every time you take a hit of helium, you're actually inhaling low energy alpha particles that would, under the right circumstances, burn you and give the worst case of skin cancer you've ever seen.
Sick indeed. I think I'm coming down with the flu. I will be in touch when I recover.
But anyway, less prattle, more pictoral.
If these were neutrons and protons, I'd be thoroughly irradiated right now. Highly amusing for some, highly disturbing for others.
Just think. Every time you take a hit of helium, you're actually inhaling low energy alpha particles that would, under the right circumstances, burn you and give the worst case of skin cancer you've ever seen.
Sick indeed. I think I'm coming down with the flu. I will be in touch when I recover.
Thursday, January 05, 2006
Attack of the Nerve
Anxiety attacks.
Well, I don't see how they can call them attacks. It's more like a mutiny, where nerves suddenly declare themselves too good for the feckless body they inhabit, and deside to go to arms against the greater cortex. The brain fights back by creating spasms, hot and cold flashes, and violent bouts of paranoia, which in the end, prove to be about as effective as kamikaze in ending the conflict.
What a joy the human "nervous" system is. If it wasn't bad enough dealing with other people, I must constantly duel with myself over seemingly harmless things.
In any event, anybody played the new Prince of Persia? The first one didn't have enough fighting, the second one had too much. The third one? Just right.
Well, I don't see how they can call them attacks. It's more like a mutiny, where nerves suddenly declare themselves too good for the feckless body they inhabit, and deside to go to arms against the greater cortex. The brain fights back by creating spasms, hot and cold flashes, and violent bouts of paranoia, which in the end, prove to be about as effective as kamikaze in ending the conflict.
What a joy the human "nervous" system is. If it wasn't bad enough dealing with other people, I must constantly duel with myself over seemingly harmless things.
In any event, anybody played the new Prince of Persia? The first one didn't have enough fighting, the second one had too much. The third one? Just right.
Tuesday, January 03, 2006
Back into the Thick
So, I've just become aware that on the 9th, we go back to classes. Fucked up classes. Classes beginning at noon, and running until 6:00.
So, my creativity. I've lost it. Has anybody seen where it went?
Ah, it's heaped over there with my notions of compassion and nobility.
Just before diving back into the thick of things, I've got the sudden compulsive urge to return to the ocean, and take a boat out onto the cold winter currents. This would be the worst time of year for sailing, but I just have the urge to leave land, and everybody on it. Take to the water, and visit islands with no people, listen to things besides voices.
I've also got a craving for salads and pizza. Always the goddamn pizza. I've had it twice this week. No more.
No more alcohol this week either. Not unless it's wine. One doesn't need so much alcohol to enjoy themselves. No more.
I'm thinking of things right now. Some people, yes. I do think about some people. But things... I will be doing in the coming weeks. Practicum will come all too soon. I'm hoping my friend will want to take me. I'm not keen on leaving the city this time. There will be assignments that I will need to find time to do, but time won't be an issue. Motivation will.
I think - maybe - somewhere, somebody's smiling for me. Because they know I won't be.
So, my creativity. I've lost it. Has anybody seen where it went?
Ah, it's heaped over there with my notions of compassion and nobility.
Just before diving back into the thick of things, I've got the sudden compulsive urge to return to the ocean, and take a boat out onto the cold winter currents. This would be the worst time of year for sailing, but I just have the urge to leave land, and everybody on it. Take to the water, and visit islands with no people, listen to things besides voices.
I've also got a craving for salads and pizza. Always the goddamn pizza. I've had it twice this week. No more.
No more alcohol this week either. Not unless it's wine. One doesn't need so much alcohol to enjoy themselves. No more.
I'm thinking of things right now. Some people, yes. I do think about some people. But things... I will be doing in the coming weeks. Practicum will come all too soon. I'm hoping my friend will want to take me. I'm not keen on leaving the city this time. There will be assignments that I will need to find time to do, but time won't be an issue. Motivation will.
I think - maybe - somewhere, somebody's smiling for me. Because they know I won't be.
Sunday, January 01, 2006
Peaceable Means
We're at a time when warfare has once again taken the forefront as the most effective foreign policy tool. On the basis of interpersonal contact, it makes me wonder if violence has once again taken the fore as the most effective means of communication.
Taking a look at my home city, gang violence is on the rise, and we had a record year for gun related deaths and gang crime. Violence in schools, although it is reportedly on the decline, I have witnessed it on the rise. Probably related to the decline of literacy in young people. They're no longer able to communicate with each other effectively, so they just beat the snot out of each other.
It makes me wonder for the future of peace on this planet. When negotations don't go as planned, will two countries go to war? Has everyone forgotten how terrible a nuclear bomb is (but remember, it will always love you!)? Have we forgotten how to sit and discuss things like rational human beings?
Yes, of course, that would assume that we were rational human beings in the first place.
The nobility... the humanity, of humanity, seems to have leeched. I can't say from where, but I've felt it. I've felt it in me as well. I get frustrated when I'm trying to speak as basic as possible to my peers, and it's still incomprehensible. Sometimes I want to smash things. What do I do? Nothing.
Perhaps it's foresight that's prevented a hundred wars, but I can see how one blow can set of a chain reaction that leads to a thousand deaths, and ultimately, a tidal current back against me. Just calm down. Relax.
Think of all the things that would warrant your violent reaction. Good. Now imagine how many times in your life they've actually happened.
I worry, sometimes. I worry that not enough people worry about this kind of stuff.
Taking a look at my home city, gang violence is on the rise, and we had a record year for gun related deaths and gang crime. Violence in schools, although it is reportedly on the decline, I have witnessed it on the rise. Probably related to the decline of literacy in young people. They're no longer able to communicate with each other effectively, so they just beat the snot out of each other.
It makes me wonder for the future of peace on this planet. When negotations don't go as planned, will two countries go to war? Has everyone forgotten how terrible a nuclear bomb is (but remember, it will always love you!)? Have we forgotten how to sit and discuss things like rational human beings?
Yes, of course, that would assume that we were rational human beings in the first place.
The nobility... the humanity, of humanity, seems to have leeched. I can't say from where, but I've felt it. I've felt it in me as well. I get frustrated when I'm trying to speak as basic as possible to my peers, and it's still incomprehensible. Sometimes I want to smash things. What do I do? Nothing.
Perhaps it's foresight that's prevented a hundred wars, but I can see how one blow can set of a chain reaction that leads to a thousand deaths, and ultimately, a tidal current back against me. Just calm down. Relax.
Think of all the things that would warrant your violent reaction. Good. Now imagine how many times in your life they've actually happened.
I worry, sometimes. I worry that not enough people worry about this kind of stuff.
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