Wednesday, April 11, 2007

Hat

I haven't much time, so I will try to be brief.

Amidst reading about the exploits in others' lives this past week, I've come to the startling realization that mine has become rather dull. Well, it's actually not all that startling. I'm working a bazillion hours a week in an office and on the street.

But anyway, I digress. I haven't written or posted here in a long time because, quite simply, I've had nothing to post. I haven't been able to go out and take interesting photos, nor have I had a burst of inspiration beyond the usual puttering of whatever it takes to fill the paper this week.

Not that anyone will read this, I've been meaning to revamp this site for weeks, but whenever I get home, the last thing I feel like doing is any kind of work-related activity.

Add that to the dejection that seems to follow me like a dark cloud, and you could almost say I'm suffering from depression, if it wasn't so cliche and emo to say so.

It's a sad state, to watch this happen. I'd be laughing if it wasn't me. Getting up to move halfway across the province, going through a joke of a relationship, watching my life savings disappear.

Yeah, I'm painting a pretty picture alright. I even left the only person I've learned to trust behind. I'm relying on patience and faith to make sure there's something there when I get back.

But then again, who the fuck has patience?

3 comments:

D. said...

Well, I know how you feel...at least I think I do.

And also the same thing happens with me and my creativity, which is one of the few things that keeps me sane these days. Hell, last night I wrote something for the first time in months and it felt...awkward.

I dunno man, we just do what we can while we're here. I think you've done a great deal of cool and interesting things with your life and I know you'll keep doing it, whether or not you're feeling depressed or burned out.

Tracy said...

Sorry you're feeling so shitey lately :( You should come visit and we will see a movie so you can partake in conversation about them ;) j/k that doesn't matter but seriously come for a visit!!!! Sorry the move wasn't all it was cracked up to be...or was it cracked up to be anything at all. I don't know....now I'm rambling and I"m going to stop.....

KGould said...

there never seems to be a happy medium does there? either everything in life hits the shit-fan at once and you feel stressed to the hilt and want to be left the hell alone,,, or there is nothing going on and you start to feel invisible. there are times when i relish the idea of having peace and no one to bother me or piss me off, nothing to think about, no where i HAVE to go.... but when i get to that point im bored out of my mind and feel totally depressed and crappy.

yes, a happy medium would be nice... i wonder how many people actually experience that??