It's been a long couple of weeks. My nerves are beginning to show it too.
There's any number of reasons for this, but most of all, I think it's a matter of course.
I'm also a little frustrated by some people this week. Insisting I have to listen or talk to them whenever they're around. I'm not an object of confession. I'll be there when you need me, but if you need me every night, your need isn't so much a must, as it is an addiction or obsession. I'm not a plaything. I'm a living, breathing human being, with wants that must be met for my enjoyment.
Sitting around for three hours a night talking about nothing does not create enjoyment for me. Especially when all intelligent or amusing conversation is ended in the first half hour, and I find myself providing one word answers to rhetorical questions for the remaining two and a half. Such dialogue is tripe, and I can't imagine why it would provide comfort to anyone, least of all when the questions are loaded.
Do you hate me?
Well, obviously, since I don't, the answer is no.
Are you comforted by this fact, that you haven't earned my ire?
I don't know how people can live like this. I could get by with someone only talking once in a while. I don't get how my not saying much in an evening (but still saying something!) is considered an affront, and that I should be made to feel guilty for not meeting my evening's rambling bullshit quota.
No thanks. If I don't talk enough for your liking, that's your problem. If you want lots of talk without a lot of substance, get a fucking parakeet.
10 comments:
I know what you mean.
to quote Eternal Sunshine: "Constantly talking isn't necessarily communicating. "
and more people need to realize that.
It's funny when you start to realize all you are doing is handing out one word answers to questions that don't even have to be asked.
Actually it's not funny. It's kind of annoying.
Anyway, I don't really talk all that much regardless.
I agree with the Eternal Sunshine... quote. Hehe I remember when we discussed it awhile back after you saw the film. So though I agree, I still maintain that sharing information about yourself or your past can be important too, though. But I guess not because it's 'communication'...rather it is a way of just sharing yourself.
So I guess now all of you guys know why I ramble so much. Not necessarily to communicate, but just because I am trying to give you a piece of me.
Hopefully this doesn't only make sense to me.
And hopefully you guys won't roll your eyes and think I missed the point!
See I don’t get that either, I don’t say very much; I’m more of a listener.
Why people need endless chatter is beyond me, but yet if you don’t comply your either frowned upon like you don’t like them, or there’s that delightful awkward silence.
It’s a loose loose situation.
The whole world should just shut up, if only for a minute.
I'm a talker. I'm also a listener. With some people I talk more than listen, with others it's the other way around.
What happens to me is I'll start feeling, because of their silence, that I am surely just annoying them. Or I'll start to worry that they're passing judgement on me that I am vacant, only capable of talking about meaningless hoodahuba.
I don't mind silences. They're not even very awkward to me, for the most part. They're natural and enjoyable.
Truth be told, as much as I may yak at you guys online, in person I'd probably barely say a word unless I REALLY wanted to be heard about something.
When it comes to communication..I think realizing that it occurs in a myriad of ways is crucial to a successful relationship of any kind, be it romantic or just friendly. Well, realizing it and making a point to be sure you're heard. Of course, if you don't know whether you're really being heard or not can foul things up. It can lead to trying SO hard that you end up shoving someone away. It can also be hard when you're unable to physically be around someone, but that's where even just patience, in my opinion, conveys a lot.
It's funny when you start to realize all you are doing is handing out one word answers to questions that don't even have to be asked.
...
I'm with Dan, that this was a really good post. But man, did it ever depress the shit out of me! Haha.
The gist of this post was that, although I love a certain someone, I'm not surrendering my time and money so I can reassure their battered self-confidence.
I mean... the mere fact that I'm here should be enough... why do I have to go through 100 questions every day that I can answer with a yes or a no?
It gets even more aggravating when its' the same questions, and the same answers every day.
I think D got the nail on the head...
I really don't know what I'm going to do. She tells me to let her know if she asks too many questions, but when I do, she just shuts up entirely. Or gets all flustered and has a miserable fit.
*jaws grinding*
When I start asking Dan about 89 questions a minute he just starts saying, "yes."
Don't you think questions in GENERAL are different than the nagging, "do you love me? am I making you mad?" type of questions?
Well, there's questions, and then there's...
Whatever that fluff is called.
I don't mind questions if they're part of an overarching discussion, but a bazillion in rapid succession... every day.
Really, DISCUSSING this phenomenon is intelligent. But I seriously question whether my one word answers that I'm forced to provide are even heard, let alone matter.
I'm sure they don't, because they're spirited away to feed some psychological monster that has rooted itself in the pit of self-doubt.
I know. I was like that too (Still am sometimes). The doubt sucks, but the key to beating it doesn't lie in looking for reassurance and validation every day.
It comes from putting forward a bit of trust and faith, that you already know the answers you seek.
Maybe it's that lack of faith that bugs me. Why would she be asking the same shit every day if she thought my answers have changed?
I'm nodding.
I'm seeing a guy who tells me
I just like listening to you talk.
...
I don't get it either. All I can do is think
I wonder how long it takes before you regret ever having said that.
I'm seeing a guy who tells me
I just like listening to you talk.
...
I don't get it either. All I can do is think
I wonder how long it takes before you regret ever having said that.
hahahahaha...believe me, I've had that same thought. And in three years D still seems to not mind (at least not horribly enough to say anything) listening to me still!
But I still feel like any day now... Hopefully not. :)
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