Madness

I've been called a lot of things in my life. A coward. A prude. An idiot.
But the one thing I'm proud of being is consistent. I don't turn my back on things easily. I'm not easily swayed. Bullheaded at times, yes. Untrusting as well, true.

But in my adult life, I've never turned my back on my friends or family.

And yet. And yet.

It's utter madness to even entertain the thought... but it's bizarre that a complete stranger can accost me in my place of employ, a place where I've served usefully and purposefully for years, and tell me I'm a good-for-nothing liar, a predator, and a cheat.

I really shouldn't even let it bother me, but I'm a bit of a history prodigy, and I can recall reading about a time when people would be shot and killed for uttering such horseshit.

Sanity is something I grapple with, sometimes on a daily basis. But looking out at the slice of this city, and indeed the culture of my people, I'm sincerely beginning to think that moderated insanity is the norm. Any aspirations for respect or normalcy are the exceptions.

I've been considering visiting a councilor. But from what I've heard, I would likely end up counseling the specialist, rather than the other way around.

It's madness. An inconsistent dance of two-faced juxtapositions, bi-polar ambitions, and a seriously lack of conscience. But I'm really the only one who sees it that way. Everyone else is alright with being a hair's-breadth away from being a walking contradiction.

Madness, I say. Madness.